Tuesday, 16 October, 2012
Dear friends, I am your sister, Mary Magdalene. I am right beside
you as your very close friend. I am not elevated above you, but one
whom you know from within. Feel for a moment our deep connection – we
are one, part of the same family.
I, too, have traveled the path of being human on Earth, have known
and explored the depths there, and have been touched by a bright and
vivid Light that inspired and took hold of me, and reminded me and made
me dream and long for a more beautiful and better world on Earth. I
have known both extremes, the Light as well as the dark. Those extremes
are poles that belong together; they are each other's driving force,
you might say. Life seems to be about opposites: Light and dark. The
feelings they call up seem to be opposites, yet there is a hidden
connection between them; they can not function, one without the other.
The experience of Light is possible only by having experienced the
absence of the Light, and by contrast with its opposite, the dark.
Never is the Light more visible than when appearing out of the
darkness. Just think of the first rays of the Sun at the waking of the
day, the warm morning light that bathes the world. How deeply it can
touch you, especially when you emerge from a cold, dark night. Contrast
creates dynamics – life, movement, growth, change – so the dark has a
function in our lives. However, humans often experience the dark as the
antithesis of Light; not as a driving force for change and growth, but
as a trap or pit into which you get caught and where you can no longer
move. From that deep pit it seems like you have lost contact with the
Light, as if it has been cut off from you.
You all know that mental state of being cut off from the Light,
being deprived of a sense of meaning and purpose in your life. That in
fact is being dead. The only possible way to die is not a physical
death, but to cease any movement in your heart, your feelings, your
mind. In reality, death does not exist; your soul is eternal and lives
on. Everything that is mortal about you is only form; your essence is
eternal and cannot die. However, you can temporarily lose sight of your
essence to such a degree that you become inwardly rigid and cease to
move. You are dead inside and you feel extremely depressed. This is an
extremely painful state.
Travel along with me for a moment. Descend with me into that
depressed state and investigate it with an open mind. What happens if
someone loses all hope, shrinks back, and feels powerless against all
the feelings that well up from within? Usually this reaction is
triggered by exterior events that are disruptive; events that a person
is unable to place in his or her frame of reference, and which make
everything in that person’s life become uncertain. It can be big
things, such as the death of someone close, becoming ill, losing one’s
job, or the breakup of a relationship. These are events that affect
people deeply, and can bring them to the edge of the abyss.
However, the darkness can sometimes also reveal itself from within
without a clear cause from without. Old emotional burdens that you once
stored in your soul’s memory come to the surface. Painful experiences,
possibly stemming from previous lives, spring up from your depths, and
you have to deal with dark feelings, fears, and doubts. Deep
experiences of lack, loneliness, and of being defeated can enter into
your psyche without reason. They can make you lose your footing as much
as any outward event that happens to you.
When someone gets caught in a depression, in a dark night of the
soul, it always comes with the experience of being engulfed and unable
to cope with all the emotions. The flow of painful, heavy emotions is
experienced as being too great to bear. You are overpowered by them, or
so it feels, and you shut down from a deep sense of powerlessness. At
the moment you turn away and refuse to face the emotions, you become
stuck. Those emotions want to flow; it is essential to emotions that
they continue moving onward, like the surge of a big wave onto a beach.
But you are afraid to allow that, so you refuse to go along with that
movement and you pull back from these flooding emotions. You build a
dam, a barrier, and say: "I cannot deal with this. I do not want this. I
want done with it". Your reaction, often out of sheer powerlessness,
creates a depression, which is a state of numbness and of being closed
off from life. Over time, that situation becomes unbearable and you no
longer want to live.
From an earthly perspective, you want to die because life is
intolerable. Seen from the soul’s perspective, you are dead, and it is
an experience so unbearable that you want to do everything you can to
put an end to this situation. The desire for death is essentially a
desire for change, a desire to live again. People who wish to commit
suicide have a deep desire for life, not for death. It is precisely
this feeling of being dead inside that drives them to extreme despair.
It is their urge to live that leads them to terminate their physical
life.
When you experience a depression, there is in you a combination of
deep resistance and at the same time extreme vulnerability. The
depression is a way to defend yourself against the enormous power of
the emotions that threaten to engulf you. You think they will destroy
you, so in your powerlessness you build a shell around yourself; you
wrap yourself in a cocoon of not wanting or being able to feel
anything. You do not want to be here any longer, just as the proverbial
ostrich with its head in the sand. You are suffocating in the sand and
yet that seems the only possible way out. And after a time you no
longer are able to get your head out of the sand, the depression. You
have become so closed off from life and from any feelings that you are
no longer able to turn things around and effect a change; the choice to
say “yes” to your emotions seems to lie beyond your power. The
depression has now reached a climax.
On the one hand, you cannot accept your emotions of fear, despair,
sadness, and loneliness, or share them with others, while on the other
hand, you know and feel that it is agonizingly painful to live without
emotions; that it is a form of death, a total denial of your living
core. After a time, you want to feel again. The pain of not feeling is
greater than the pain of feeling your emotions. That is your salvation,
and this is the turning point. The refusal to feel, and the saying:
“No, I can't, I don't want it, I want to be dead, I want to disappear”,
makes you so hollow and empty inside that you can no longer sustain
it. What happens from the perspective of the soul is that life is
becoming stronger now; it can not be held back indefinitely. When the
life force has been restrained strongly for a very long time, it
creates an opposing force that eventually erupts. The strength of the
tidal wave that wants to roll out onto the beach can not be held back
forever. At a certain moment, from within you, emerges a “yes”, even
if you are not aware of it consciously. Nothing is static in life; the
urge for life is unstoppable. When a climax has been reached, you
create events in your life that provide change; that create a
breakthrough.
Sometimes this happens in the form of a suicide attempt. If it
fails, there may be an upward spiral because the suffering of that
person becomes very visible to the outside world. When someone
discovers how much other people care about them, there may arise an
opening to more Light, and to the receiving of understanding and
sympathy. However, it may also happen that someone does not open up and
remains depressed. There is no fixed recipe for how a breakthrough
occurs. However, life has a pushing and driving force that makes it
impossible to linger endlessly in a static state of consciousness.
Even when the earthly life ends by actually taking your own life,
you immediately have to face new choices on the other side, because you
will still have to experience your feelings there. The gloom that was
there while alive, with its feelings of pain and anxiety, is now able
to come forward even more sharply, and in a less veiled way. Sometimes
the astral realm where you end up after death confronts you directly
with the emotions that you repressed, and through this they begin to
flow again. For example, someone may feel desperate and horrified when
they have passed over and discover that life has not really ended. Or
they sees the emotions of their family on Earth, their grief and
sadness, and are very affected by it. By being so touched, a new
movement can be set in motion in the soul who has passed over. It can
lead to a breakthrough, making that soul open to help from guides who
are always there, both on Earth and in heaven. Help is always there,
provided you are open to it.
No matter which way you twist or turn, life is more powerful than
any death wish. Life always reassumes its right to be, you cannot kill
it. Therefore, there is always hope. Hold on to that for yourself, but
also for others whom you see suffering. Things can seem so hopeless at
times, but there is always another outlook, even though you cannot
imagine in your mind how that can be and how change is going to take
place. Life is always stronger than death, the Light stronger than the
dark. The water eventually breaks through a dam, because water has the
power to move: it pushes, it is alive! The power of the water is
stronger than the resisting force that wants to hold it back.
Feel the driving force of life in yourself for a moment. Each of you
sometimes finds yourself with parts that are stuck, patterns that
repeat themselves endlessly: doubts about yourself, feelings of
inferiority, uncertainty, mistrust, anger, resistance. Now imagine that
those parts are just there, and that life continues to flow around
them at the same time. The water continues to flow, and although there
remain boulders in the stream that seem so fixed and unmoving, they
still are worn down by the movement and pushing of the water moving
past them. It takes time, but do not forget who you are: you are the
living water! The more you remind yourself of that, the more you can
reclaim the energy from those boulders and stones that lie in the
stream. There is pain from the past that continues to be there. You do
not have to downplay that, or make it irrelevant, but neither do you
have to lug those boulders from the river. You only have to remind
yourself that you are the water!
This can be difficult at times because, in part, you have become
identified with those boulders that block your energy: "I am someone
who is not properly grounded; I have difficulty feeling at home on
Earth; I carry sadness and traumas from the past". And that is all
true, but imagine for a moment those ideas as rocks or stones in a
large, wide river – a huge waterway. Because that is who you are; that
is your actual life force. It is your soul that flows and flows, always
along its path: alive, bubbling, rushing and roaring, exploring and
discovering. That flow has no judgment about those boulders that it
encounters, it engulfs them. You do have a choice!
Of course, you occasionally get stuck with your consciousness in
such a blockage when you begin to identify with it for too long. But
you can detach from that blockage by just experiencing yourself as the
flowing water. Remember that you are a living, soul-consciousness,
always moving and flowing and not bound to those boulders –
you are free.
The more you withdraw your consciousness from those blockages, the
rocks that lie there, the easier they give themselves up to the flow.
They release sooner because you let go of them and identify yourself
with the moving water.
The water is your soul, and it can not be held back.
Feel it flowing and moving and sparkling. Imagine that it is washing
over you, and feel the bubbling strength, the Light that sparkles in it.
Feel how your soul, in its deepest part, is not threatened by the
darkness that you experience; by those boulders that appear to be so
solid and unyielding. Your soul is not at all troubled by what is there,
because it knows the boulders belong there; they are part of the
landscape of life. Try, when you are stuck within such a boulder, to
hear the water rushing by. Remember the water and the ease with which it
flows.
You do not have to do everything yourself. Life provides you with
endless opportunities and possibilities. It might sometime bring you
into deep, dark valleys, but it also propels you up again into the
Light. Even when you have the feeling of no longer being able to
struggle on, and you cannot see how things can ever turn out well, life
still propels you. The art of living is to preserve your trust, even
when there seems to be nothing left to trust, and when everything that
you were certain of has disappeared from your life.
At this time on Earth, many people are involved with the processing
of ancient darkness; parts of the soul are coming to Light right now
and want to be seen. And why is that so?
Because you are making a leap forward.
It is really a leap in the evolution of the consciousness of humanity.
This leap cannot be made without reaching out to the darkest places in
your consciousness, those that are filled with fear, distrust, or a
very deep sadness about everything that you have experienced on Earth.
Do not be afraid of that darkness –
welcome it!
When you say “yes” to the darkness, it begins to release and flow, and
that is the art of living this life. And when you feel: "I can’t
really say yes to this”, remember there is something in you that still
says “yes”. That is what will save you and bring you along further –
trust in life.
I love you all, you are dear to me. Maybe you think: "How can that
be? You can not know us all personally”. But you as a human do not know
or realize how extensive the network of souls really is. When you have
connected from the soul with another, that is a permanent connection. A
bond once forged will not separate through time, because in our
dimension
there is no time. There is a
living network connecting us as souls. We share a certain history, a
certain desire, a flame that was once ignited in our consciousness.
With this flame the Earth becomes gradually lit. The awakened
consciousness in all people brings us together and creates a new
foundation, from which that leap into consciousness is really going to
take place. You do not need to ponder over this. Stay with your own
process, your own way – that is sufficient. Feel the powerful thrust of
life, not only in you, but in many others, through which a wave of
consciousness is flooding over the Earth.
Copyright © Pamela Kribbe - Permission is granted to copy and redistribute this article on the condition that the URL
www.jeshua.net is included as the resource and that it is distributed freely.
